How yogi, mom, and activist Hillary Lopes stays grounded through it all.
– KEYS SOULCARE
What’s clear within a minute of meeting breathwork facilitator, health advocate, and triplet boy mom Hillary Lopes is her sense of self and purpose. What’s not so clear — and why we wanted to pick her brain — is how she does it. Here’s our chat about her ongoing journey through wellness, motherhood, and more.
My name is Hillary, and I’m a…
Mindfulness educator and yoga teacher with The Lineage Project. My students are youth aged 11 through 24, in vulnerable situations — meaning incarceration-, court-involved, or suspension-involved. I’m also a newly minted doula!
My journey as a health advocate began as…
My professional dance career [with Dance Theater of Harlem] was ending. Despite welcoming people of color there was still a “need” to be a certain size. That was just not healthy.
It was painful to love something so much from the time I was little, then to be met with such disregard for my humanity. To say I was “kind of a mess” would be putting it lightly. (I was 22. Who isn’t already enough of a mess at that age?!)
My earliest memory of yoga is…
A friend taking me to a class, and noticing there were no mirrors! I was like, Whoa, wait a minute. I’m going to be moving my body and not have to look at myself? I was in a teaching program within months.
My journey as a writer started with…
Journaling. I’ve spent a lifetime getting to know my own voice. The older I got, the more wrote for myself in spaces not always carved out for Black women and wellness — as I have here in this blog post.
Lately, I’m most inspired to write about…
Parenthood and identity. I’ve spent 33 years being Hillary. I had kids and, all of a sudden, now I’m “Mom” first. It’s truly fascinating.
I’m inspired to work with mothers because of…
My own experience. I come from a very supportive family. I had an education. Everything you’d check off a list.
Even so, my postpartum period has felt earth-shaking at times. So if I’ve got all this love and support surrounding me, and it’s still this challenging, I can only imagine what it’s like for women that maybe have one less pillar of support — from far away grandparents to less resources in general.
There’s a genuine curiosity in me of, ‘Hey, what’s going on for you?’ and then learning while also holding space.
Tools for being the mom that I am include…
Showering! It’s my time to comb out my hair and tend to myself. Also, taking a moment for meditation and (honestly!) checking in with my accountability partner about it. I’m giving myself grace to take ten or even three, or do walking ones, if that’s the headspace I’m in.
The significance of breath in my life is…
Huge. I had an emergency C-section, which felt like my own personal episode of ER. My doctor looked me straight in the eye and said, ‘You practice yoga and breathwork, right? This is a time to use it.’ I thought, Oh. I can do that!
I stay grounded in my vision for myself through…
A grace practice. It’s akin to a gratitude practice, but often comes up as things that I’m having difficulty embracing. I ask, How can I offer more grace there? How can I insert little ‘It’s okays’ throughout my day to day? Without witnessing them as laziness or excuses, or whatever else one could attach to it? I do it to honor grace and humility at my core, and to keep inviting it into my life.
A few tools for being the partner to my kids’ dad are…
Interesting story. My partner and I just decided to separate, romantically. It’s a very real aspect of my life, and certainly a part of my grace practice. My sons’ father and I are committed to parenting and constantly seeking ways to better communicate. It’s hard for me when I do mess up or fall short on certain things. My grace practice allows me to be a better partner and co-parent, but it’s still really hard.
I’m inspired to move my body each day because…
You have to run after toddlers to keep them safe! Also, I know that the moments I’ve been the most depleted are when I’ve lost my physical movement. Going on a 20-minute walk or rolling around the floor and throwing my kids in the air does wonders.
The mantra that’s guiding me right now is…
Pause. Breathe. Begin again. If we just slow down and take one breath, we might see different pathways through problems, or just have more presence in moments of potential joy.
What words, tools, and grace are you putting into practice lately?
Related Stories
